Lewis wondered at the sudden air of excited anticipation tinged with anxiety that seemed to hang in the air at the office over the past few days. In the three weeks since he’d joined the team, he had never seen the rest of his fellows quite so wound up. Yann had grown completely silent, Sam had begun sorting and re-sorting everything on his desk. Jonah and David spent most of their time bickering over various ways to handle Loschmidt’s paradox and Jim did nothing but follow up on cases they were working on. Nothing major had come across their desks in the past few weeks since they’d closed the Patterson case. But now it seemed as if there were an invisible countdown clock that everyone except for him was aware of.
“Newbie,” Jim said, pulling Lewis out of his thoughts, “are you busy?”
“Not at the moment,” Lewis replied.
“Good. I could use your help with something.” The entire team perked up, going to attention at that. Even Lewis was intrigued. Jim rarely asked for help.
“I’d be happy to, sir,” he said carefully as he rose from his desk and walked into Jim’s office. Lewis could have sworn he heard stifled snickering from the rest of the team and, upon entering his boss’s workroom, he could see why. “Permission to speak frankly, sir,” he requested, his voice a little hoarse and tremulous as he worked out the most diplomatic manner in which to phrase his next question.
“Go ahead,” Jim sighed.
“Why in God’s name didn’t you ask building maintenance to come in and do this for you?” Lewis yelped as he gestured at the unmitigated disaster in front of him. “That’s what they are there for. That’s what the city of New Orleans pays them to do. For a man who has multiple doctorates, you certainly can show a surprising lack of common sense at times. You’re fortunate that this wasn’t a load-bearing wall!”
“I did manage to determine it wasn’t a support structure before I began dismantling it,” Jim said, his tone somewhere between abashed and proud of his handiwork. “As for why I didn’t submit the request through proper channels — it takes them forever to get anything done and they never get it done right.”
“May I ask why you’re removing the wall between this office and the unit commander’s office?” Lewis muttered as he surveyed the damage. The ruined plaster, drywall, sheet-rock, and frames were manageable if messy but the tangled mass of electrical cabling were the true concern. The detective sent up a silent prayer to the Almighty that the plumbing pipes would be run through the floor and along specific corridor points in a building like this so Sergeant Noble’s foray into interior des-corating wouldn’t result in water damage. “And do you have the specifications for this area? I need to know what those cables and wires are before I touch them.”
“I thought it would be nice to be able to have a conversation with Alex without having to use the phone or walk out of my office, through the open area, and into that office. We have a very free-form relationship and bounce ideas off each other. The wall would put an end to that and no matter how either of us worked the math, we couldn’t manage to fit both of us into one of these rooms. So, the wall had to go,” Jim replied with a shrug as if that explained everything. Lewis stared at the man as if he were crazy. “It makes perfect sense!”
“To you, I’m sure it does,” Lewis said flatly. “You couldn’t have just rearranged the workspace in the bullpen?”
“The chief ordered us to start using these offices,” Jim sighed. “He told Alex that we had to start using them for something other than storage. Apparently, we’re not allowed to treat our ranks as purely titular things that come with some extra paperwork. So, we started cleaning out the rooms but then Alex was forced to take some personal leave and I’ve been left dealing with it.”
“Which led to you trying to tear down the wall.”
“Exactly.”
“Were you dropped on your head as a small child?”
“No,” Jim said dryly. “I also did not eat paint chips. I’m just not very good at waiting around on bureaucracy or being patient in general. Besides, Alex will be back in a few days and I’d really hoped to have this fixed by then.”
“Trying to kiss up to the lieutenant?” Lewis quipped. “Why not take him to a strip club on Bourbon Street?”
“Don’t start,” Jim said, all humor gone. “Can you help me with this or not?”
“I can,” Lewis sighed. “But I’m going to need the schematics before we do anything else.”
“I can get you those. Anything else you’ll need?”
Lewis studied the tools Jim had strewn over his desk before shaking his head. “No, you have everything else here. I would suggest that you go cut the power to this area and inform maintenance about your demolition project. That might spur them to get in here and get it fixed properly. However, it’s going to keep everyone else from getting work done until we finish knocking down this wall and re-running the cabling.”
“Great! I’ll just go take care of that then,” Jim said brightly. Lewis watched the other sergeant dart out of the office. He was mystified by the man. Every time Lewis thought he had his boss figured out, the man did something that threw him for a loop. And now their lieutenant would be returning which meant that he’d have another person to puzzle out. Lewis just prayed that the team leader would have a bit more common sense than Sergeant Noble did. Taking another look at the disaster in front of him, the detective thought that might not be too tall an order to make.
~*~*~*~
Jim managed not to look too smug when the chief was forced to send a work crew in to repair the renovations he’d attempted to the office. Truth be told, it had been difficult for him to do that bad a job of it. Botching things didn’t come easily to him and though he might not have done a lot of manual labor, he had grown up in the South where shop classes were still mandatory for boys. Still, it was an easy enough assumption to make and he’d been able to kill two birds with one stone on that — he’d gotten the wall taken down so he and Alex could continue their collaboration and he’d destroyed all of the bugs the chief and internal affairs had planted in there. When Alex returned, she’d be bringing some custom gear that she’d found online and had modified so that any other listening devices that found their way into their offices would transmit nothing but static back to their spy masters.
The question of why IA or the administration wanted to keep such close tabs on him and Alex was a matter of no little speculation in the team. Frankly, there were days that Jim wished the city would disband their unit entirely. It would sting temporarily — losing the atmosphere they’d cultivated — but he and Alex could get their pick of assignments around the country now that she no longer had to deal with Jeremy and the rest of their motley crew would land on their feet just the same. The general consensus was that there had to be more behind it than just a desire to get rid of a few undesirable detectives whom others found it difficult to work alongside. After all, their unit closed more cases and won more of their cases than any other team in the region. Their numbers helped bring in more funding for everyone — the main concern of most administrators and bureaucrats — as well as providing justice and security for the citizens of New Orleans.
“Is this newbie’s baptism by electricity?” Sam asked in a whisper when Jim sat down next to him on the couch in their break area. “Because, if it is, he’s going to survive it.”
“It’s a way to keep him out of my hair and to test him at once,” Jim replied. “We recruited him, yes, and he does have all of the markers we look for but if they were going to worm a spy in here, now would be the time and he would be the person to use. He may not even know they’re doing it.”
“Well, he’s not a bad guy,” Sam sighed. “I hope he doesn’t turn out to be a rat. I like him.”
“He is competent. I’ll grant him that. He picked apart the Pritchard Place prowler case in less than six hours.”
“How much did you and Al lose on that one?”
“Fifty and seventy-five dollars respectively. She nearly choked to death when I told her. Luckily, Lil and Cici were there. I now have orders from my Higher Authority not to spring that kind of news on Al without asking her to swallow whatever she’s drinking first.”
“How is Lil holding up?”
“Oh, she’s doing better now that she’s got Al staying over with us. Though, if Cici doesn’t cut it with the harem jokes soon, I think I may be bringing Al and Lil in on indecency charges.”
“You know what Jonah says…” Sam grinned.
“I could set the site up myself,” Jim laughed. “The only way he’s getting cut in for half is if he comes over to run lights and sound.”
“Yann and I could help you with marketing and SEO, boss.”
“It’d be a porn site,” Jim grimaced. “Do you really think it would need much marketing and SEO beyond ‘hot blonde and brunette getting it on?’”
“Well, you’d want ad distribution and handling and I imagine you’d be busy directing product creation so…”
“How much?” Jim groaned as he scrubbed a hand through his chestnut hair.
“Ten percent.”
“Done. Granted, this all hinges on Al and Lil agreeing to the whole sordid mess to begin with.”
“What sordid mess?” Yann asked as he settled down on the couch. “Did you finally get everything arranged on your desk to your satisfaction, cher Samuel?”
“Drop it, Yann,” Jim warned. “We’re all a little nervous about Al coming back. The fact that we’ve got eyes on us isn’t helping.”
“If you’re worried that newbie is a bon rien, don’t. Bebs can come back sans peur.”
“She’s not afraid. She’s being cautious.”
“N’importe quoi.”
“Just drop it,” Jim repeated. “Al will be back next week. The last thing she needs is us sniping at each other.”
“If she wants to avoid getting embroiled in an argument, she needs to get a ticket out of here,” Sam muttered. “Granted, she starts close to a third of them herself but…”
“Zzt,” Yann hissed as Lewis walked out of Jim’s office. The new guy glanced over at them with a frown of annoyance and disgust. He walked over, pulling off his work gloves and glasses. His curly black hair was coated with a light dusting of gray powder and his clothes were stained with dust, dirt, and sweat. Jim almost felt sorry for the man. If he turned out not to be a rat, then Jim would owe him for this particular method of torture.
“I hope that building management sends someone to finish this up,” Lewis said as he walked over to the break area. “As it stands, I’m fairly certain that you aren’t going to have an accidental fire on your hands. With that in mind, there were some strange things going on with the wiring. Did you pull out anything that was connected to the power lines directly? I saw some terminating clips and a few extra wires that just didn’t make any sense and weren’t in the schematics.”
“I removed nothing,” Jim said evenly and calmly.
“I see,” Lewis replied in the same tone. “I’ve done all I can for now. The rest of the work will need more people and different tools to complete but should be done by next week.”
“Good job, Harding.”
Lewis sat down on one of the plastic chairs. Yann stretched out and, hooking his foot around the coffee table, dragged it closer to the couch. Jim and Sam both winced at the noise it made but said nothing. His task completed, Yann began resetting the board game that dominated the table. “D’ya play, Harding?” he asked conversationally.
“What is it?” Lewis replied at the same time Jim groaned and covered his eyes.
“Yann, you don’t even play. You barely understand the principles of the game. That’s why Al wipes the floor with you every single time,” he growled. “Do not handicap the new guy with your infantile technique.”
“What is it?” Lewis asked again.
“Go,” Sam answered. “And do not let Yann try to teach you that. Al is the master there though Jim runs a close second.”
“They’re right,” Yann laughed. “Now, I can teach you Bourré if you’re bored.”
“No thanks,” Lewis said politely. “Surely we’ll be getting a case soon. Won’t we?” he added when Jim, Yann, and Sam scoffed or snorted derisively at once. “Why not?”
“They don’t like giving us anything they don’t have to,” Jim explained calmly. “We get whatever the other departments can’t figure out. Our actual jurisdiction is fairly small. Now, the sheriff’s department will call on us when they get overwhelmed but that’s not been happening too much lately. There’s been some talk about putting us all on cold cases or cybercrime but…”
“The only reason they haven’t sent us packing is because of union rules and because, frankly, they need us. They don’t like it but they need us because we make them look brilliant. However, we’re under-utilized as hell because none of us are good at the political game,” Sam elaborated.
“I see,” Lewis sighed. “So, what do you do when there’s no active case to work on?”
“Whatever the hell we want,” Jim admitted with an air of perfect frankness. “Why else do you think Jonah and David are over there making perfect asses of themselves trying to explain Loschmidt’s paradox in what they think is a creative manner but shows that neither passed thermodynamics at the graduate level?”
“I’m building a particle accelerator,” Yann announced. “Al’s helping me with it.”
“What?!” Jim screeched. “Why and why wasn’t I told about this?”
“Antimatter bombs, propulsion systems, and because I won the bet over whether or not the brassling we were watching was cheating,” Yann said smugly. “Silence was the payment.” Lewis shook his head and then winced as the dust from his hair fell into his eyes. Apparently, he really was working in an open-air asylum. The only problem was…it was the first place he’d felt half-way at home in years.